184: Godly Particles and Illiteracy

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Today, Dan tells Jordan all about a time travel request from Listener Johnathan, where the gents listen to Jim Bakker and some of his dumb friends talking about CERN. That is where the episode starts, but it goes so far off the rails that nothing in this description could ever help you make sense of what it is about.

Tidbits

• Is a steel horse a train or motorcycle
• CERN is looking for god, why not go to church
• Jordan loves CERN
• Tom Horn is a jowel monster
• Jordan thinks his own voice is grating
• Tom Horn knows the science (not)
• LHC is god's voice
• Shiva does the cosmic dance
• what's the deal with the Shiva statue outside the LHC
• Science proves god
• Tom vastly misinterprets quantum mechanics
• LHC is trying to verify parallel reality
• Tower of babel
• Jim says you can't build a tower that high, do you just want to walk up and say "hi god"
• cohost Zack thinks tower of babel could have reached heaven
• CERN is tower of babel
• Tom went to Mt Graham
• Large binocular telescope has a Lucifer lens that the Vatican uses to track Niburu
• Lucifer lens is actually a partial acronym
• Guy Consolmagno is a Vatican astonomer who Tom lied about and claimed he said Jesus is a hybrid
• Tom is a knave
• According to Apache, Mt Graham is a portal where many entities have come across
• Metro Phoenix is called Valley of the Sun because the sun god flooded the valley and killed the giants (jk, it's marketing)
• Reptoid with halo came through portal and taught Puebloans sorcery, then giants came through and killed them
• portals are blase, angels are just messengers, can be any race
• We have more ghost hunter shows because there are more ghosts
• Euphrates river will open up portals and kill 1/3 of humanity
• Dan on birds: too loud!
• Bradshaw Ranch is famous for UFOs and orbs
• using 2 cameras proves orbs are real
• Magic water bottle alkalizes your water
• Laurie is blown away by portals and has seen angelic and demonic supernatural events, Jim doesn't care
• Tom believes in hollow earth and book of Enoch
• Book of Enoch says Endtimes will be 2015-2017 (if you're stupid)
• Jim and Tom say Jesus and apostles read septuagint (apostles were likely illiterate)
• Love of money is evil, give Jim money
• Don't trust what people say without verifying, but you can trust Jim without verifying
• AIDS comes from animals
• Wes Anderson/con man style discussion
• Angels want physical bodies so they made chimeras
• CERN will open the door to the pit
• What does CERN mean
• CERN is named after a Celtic pagan god (no it's not)
• I Am Legend is the antichrist
• Laurie's House needs $200k for faucets

References

• On The Path of the Immortals